Who is Dibs?
Monday, December 27th, 2010
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Karl’s note: This post was inspired by the book, “Dibs in Search of Self,” by Virginia Axline.
First, let me say it doesn’t matter who Dibs is. It doesn’t matter because as you read the book you connect with the character of Dibs. You saw yourself through his story.
What does matter is what you do with this knowledge.
Before I lose you…I know this is a career development site. Let me explain who Dibs is. Dibs is a young boy who went into therapy because his parents thought that he was mentally defective. (Spoiler alert!). He was actually a genius. The book was created to help play therapy counselors understand how play therapy can build a kid’s confidence and awareness.
For those of you who want a little back story, Dibs In Search of Self is a book that was written in 1963 about a young boy who communicated with his parents by screaming at them or ignoring them. He was a lost soul that needed help.
Why?
You are probably wondering why I’m writing about a book that is over 40 years old and why I’m writing about some 5 year old kid from over 4 decades ago. Because the book exposes what many people think about themselves. The reason I read the book is because my wife is a counselor and was required to read the book for one of her classes.
The book is relevant because of how the reader sees himself through the boy’s eyes. We all struggle to be accepted. We allow people to hurt us.
Most of us let our arch nemesis dictate our happiness. You do this because you are afraid to live a better life. Your arch nemesis power comes from your past. You’ve learned how to communicate with yourself in the way that kills your confidence.
So, Dibs’ therapist recorded the sessions and put them into a book that thousands of counselors have read. These counselors influence the direction of our children’s lives. You must understand the importance of what Dibs represents. I want you to understand that what you see in Dibs, you see in yourself.
Your career is filled with pain, happiness and love. The best way you can be open to all these emotions is if you are willing to analyze your reactions to this book.
This book of course isn’t the only book that does this. We see ourselves through Seth Godin, Malcolm Gladwell, and Anthony Robbins because we want to unleash our superpowers. We either relate and build a stronger and smarter life or we fold like a thin cracker and go crawl in the corner to cry ourselves to sleep.
Your Career
Your career is dependent on how truthfully and confidently you think of your superpowers. If you don’t believe that you are here to do great things then you should stop reading now. This article is for people who think they are special.
I’m not talking about becoming president. That would be great and all, but I’m talking about wanting to improve people’s lives, wanting them to be happier than their parents, and improving on each generation’s overall happiness.
So let’s get back to the beginning.
Dibs
Dibs’ parents brought him to this therapist to figure out his problem. The therapist recorded the sessions, changed his name, and everyone is curious about who he is today.
It turns out Dibs was a genius. He was able to read by the age of 2. He was so smart that by age 6 he dumbed down his artwork in first grade so the other kids wouldn’t realize how smart he was. He wanted the kids to like him so he played on their level. The way you see how his mind work’s through the author’s eyes is an amazing journey.
Dibs’ therapist showed him that just being himself was ok. It was better than ok; it was the easiest way to live.
What We Really See
This book holds a little bit of each of us within it. I couldn’t read by the time I was 2 and I didn’t hold back my ability to read middle school material in first grade, but I’ve held back in other areas. I’ve held back because I was afraid. Fear plays such a huge role in our lives that we can’t ignore these feelings. Click here to check out the course that I created with Nathan Hangen that we recently launched.
You’ve probably held yourself back to fit in at work or school. I know you’ve been there because you were afraid of the back lash that might occur. We’ve all been there. We don’t want to put ourselves out there to be judged.
You have amazing superpowers that need to be shared with the world. Figuring out how to make this happen isn’t easy, I know that, but it’s the best way for you to really discover who you are and what makes you happy.
Finish Line
In the end of any career, that’s how we judge our actions. Were we happy?
Isn’t that what life comes down to at the end of a day, year and life time?
Memory is a fickle friend because most of us look back and see the good times, forgetting the ugly memories. This can be good, but under exposing the truth of what we really need is just as bad. You must really listen to your needs, search deep inside yourself and ask, “Am I happy with the work that I am doing?”
Your answer will eventually come if you sit long enough and really listen to your thoughts. When the answer does come, the next step is creating a plan that gets you so excited that you have to act. You have to make changes to align your values with the work that you do every day.
Once you are in alignment, you will feel like you are playing instead of working. You will be living a dream that you didn’t think was possible.
Dibs felt safe with the therapist because she accepted whatever he did. She didn’t judge.
You need to accept who you are. You have to accept your superpowers and not be afraid to unleash them into the world. We need you now more than ever. Who cares what your co-workers and friends think of your crazy idea, let it out and make this world a better place.
Do you take time to listen to your thoughts? (Meditation)
Do you plan time for reflection? (1 sentence journal)
Do you need to make a change in your career?
What is the first thing you can do to unleash your superpowers and happiness?
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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Karl Staib, DeskAway. DeskAway said: #productivity #work Who is Dibs? http://ow.ly/1aCZRK [...]
We really appreciate many of the comments in this post. How being true to oneself is the easiest way to live is wise counsel. In addition, the advice to meditate and reflect is very important, as these are the building blocks of change. We now LIKE you on Facebook too!
Hi HaW, Meditation is a big part of my life and can help any career. It’s actually a must in my life, but everyone has their own way of doing things. Thanks for liking me on Facebook. It means a lot.
Hi Karl,
Thanks for sharing this book with us. It sounds fascinating.
I tried to write a response earlier but it seems these days when I use the email address attached to my website and include the url for my blog or website, the comments seem to vanish into the mist. I’m guessing that somehow it’s being read as spam. Weird.
Have a great day.
Hi Sue, The book is very well done and still holds up even after 40 years. It’s well worth your time even if you aren’t a high school counselor.
Do you take time to listen to your thoughts?
You just reminded me. Got to meditate right about now. The best way to end your mental turmoil and create an inner sense of positive direction and unity.