Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Mike Bundrant of iNLP.

“Do it, Mike! Just do it! Stop your whining and get off your butt!”

This is how I used to motivate myself. I carried around an inner high school football coach to bark at me whenever he thought I was slacking. The problem was, I constantly stressed myself out. Worse, half the time I “rebelled” against this inner dictator and became passive aggressive toward my own goals. How’s that for nutty?

Patterns

Actually, this is a common pattern. A “dictator” style of motivation has an undermining effect in the long run. Most people don’t like to be ordered around. In the workplace it leads to low morale and a low productivity, high-turnover workforce. Dictator-style parents tend to divide families and create harsh rivalries in the home. Ordering yourself around leads to the number one killer of personal development goals: self-sabotage.

Think about it. To your mind and body, a harsh, loud voice ordering you around is jarring, regardless of the source. You respond with stress and resistance whether from an outsider imposing his will or you imposing your will upon yourself. In the end, your brain experiences the commands in a similar fashion. Your mind places a lot less emphasis on the origin of an experience than you may think. All of us can make our mouths water just by imagining a delectable dessert. We’ve all reacted with fear to inner thoughts that had no basis in external reality. Ordering yourself around is being ordered around, period. Chances are, you don’t like it and will shut down, refusing to take any action at all.

The stress and resistance of dictatorial self-motivation is an expressway to self-sabotage. “I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to do!” is the common response to inappropriate commands, even when those commands are self-generated. It’s a perfect set up.

A New Way

Zen Motivation changes all this. The need to bark orders and force yourself to do things doesn’t even arise in a Zen motivation state. Motivating yourself to do things, even unpleasant things, is a normal part of living and comes quite naturally when in a more Zen-like state, connected to the present moment. Do this exercise and see what I mean.

1. Consider one thing that you need to motivate yourself to do, such as exercise, pull weeds, meet with a difficult colleague, and so forth. If you can, write down the name of the task in the middle of a piece of paper (if you have a pen and paper).

2. Become aware how you would typically motivate yourself to do this and write down (if you can) the thoughts and feelings that come next. For example, “Get it done!” or “Let’s move!” or “I just have to get this done!” or “Come on, Mike!” or (feelings, too) “Tension in chest and shoulders.” Write freely for a minute or so and don’t censor yourself.

3. Just clear your mind for a few moments. Shake it off.

4. Forget everything and enter a more present, grounded state by tuning into a mundane sound, such as the sound of distant traffic, the hum of your computer (or the white noise of a fan, refrigerator, running water, etc…). Don’t do anything else or try to relax – just tune into the sound. Keep listening for a minute or more, until you feel settled.

5. When you feel more settled, reconsider the task you need to get done. Write it down on a clean sheet of paper and notice the thoughts and feelings that come to your mind and body. Do you notice the difference? In this more calm state, what words can you choose to gently motivate yourself? How much easier is it to avoid ordering yourself around while you are feeling more settled and connected to the outside world?

For managers, the key to motivating employees rests with the quality of the relationship – how well do they treat their employees? Likewise, the key to motivating yourself is correlated with how well you treat yourself. Zen motivation allows you to motivate yourself from a more grounded, connected state. When you do, your tendency to order yourself around will vanish and your productivity will increase. Best of all, you’ll be respecting yourself more.

Mike Bundrant is an NLP trainer with the iNLP Center. Visit iNLP for a free personal development mini course and learn more about the Zen Motivation Twitter Party.

Image courtesy of phoeric.

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Lisa H. (aka RunningBear) of Getting to Zen

If you charge for your work, then you know the dilemma between charging hourly versus charging by the project. There are arguments for and against both. For example, if you charge by the project, you could end up doing a lot more work than the project is worth and if you charge by the hour, you many lose clients to the variability of the cost. Knowing the personality type of the persons you are working with can not only help you in deciding how to charge for your efforts but make your working relationships a whole lot smoother.

The project

When most of my clients ask me to design a web site, I quote them a price, design the site and post it for review a few days later. For the most part, the design elements (layout, font, colors, pictures) are left to me. And so when Tom, whom I had designed four club web sites for in this way came to me and asked me to design one for his company, I quoted a price and off I went.

The players

Tom was happy with the final design, however, Sara, who I had not met and seemed to be in charge of the project, was not. She gave me a few pointers and with that I designed a second site. The same thing happened. Tom was happy with it and Sara once again was not. Now, instead of designing one site for the quoted price, I had designed two and would have to design a third to satisfy her.

The drama

After a phone conversation with Sara, I realized that she wanted the project to be more of a collaborative effort. Not only did she have a specific way that she worked, but she had a specific vision of how she wanted the site to look. Sara wanted to select the layout, fonts, colors, images and image were used and then get input from everyone else in the company.

The awakening

After speaking with Sara, I knew that even after the third site was created there could be several more changes to it. I had already put in double the work I had expected and was beginning to feel taken advantage of.

The epiphany

And then it occurred to me that Sara wasn’t trying to make the project difficult. We worked differently and she was just being herself. In that instant I knew I would needed to change my approach to the work. The next day I sent an email to the company telling them that from now on, I would charge hourly. Problem solved.

The resolution

This way Sara could ask me to make as many changes as she wanted to and I would not mind because I knew that I would get compensated for making them.

What I learned is how important it is to know the personality type of those who you work with. According to the SELF profile by National Press Publications, there are four broad types of personalities in the business world.

I have provided a snapshot of each of them below.

Do you know which one you fit into most? How about your coworkers?

“S” Personalities

Type: creative, enthusiastic, sociable, impatient, gregarious involved

Strengths: original, conceptual, warm, approachable, flexible

Weaknesses: unrealistic, devious, impractical, undisciplined, uncontrolled

Preferences: adventure, fun, excitement, getting to the point

Allow sociable people the flexibility to be creative. They seek recognition. Reward their work with enthusiasm. Make sure they get lots of credit and respect their need to be social.

“E” Personalities

Type: task-oriented, results-focused, action-oriented, workaholic, hard charging

Strengths: pragmatic, assertive, directive, competitive, confident, open to options

Weaknesses: domineering, arrogant, status-seeking

Preference: The bottom line

Take advantage of this personality types need to be in control and clean up messes. When business gets bad, they are the ones to call on.

“L” Personalities

Type: emotional, caring introspection, melancholy, sympathetic, diplomatic

Strengths: persuasive, probing, loyal, warm, sensitive, supportive

Weakness: Impulsive, procrastinating, subjective, overcautious

Preference: no threat or conflict, avoids making decisions or risking offending others

Treat this personality type fairly, supportively and openly. Compromise and strive for consensus. They are team players and want what is best for everyone.

“F” Personalities

Type: analytical, logical, self controlled, detail oriented, aloof, skeptical, conservative

Strengths: perfectionist, well-organized, objective, relational, conceptual, persistent

Weakness: withdrawn, sullen, dull, shy, passive

Preference: facts, figures, proof, thoroughness

Acknowledge this personality type’s expertise. Give them factual data and be consistent. Provide them with well-thought out plans of action.

While reading through the personality types you may have found that you fit into more than one category. This is common. We all have traits of each of the personality types; however, one is usually dominant. Remember, no one personality type is better than the other, they are just different. Keep this article in mind the next time you encounter someone, it will make your relating to them a whole lot easier.

Lisa H. (aka RunningBear) is the founder of Getting to Zen-a personal development blog dedicated to those in pursuit of authentic happiness through purposeful living. You can sign up for her RSS feed or follow her on Twitter.

Image courtesy of Ghostboy.

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Kenneth McCall is director of IT for storage.com.

I love email. It gives me a running record of who said what when. I can write a very business-like email even late at night or early in the morning – look how late he’s working, impressive! I can give bad news gently without having to actually face the person. I get to use passive-aggressive smiley faces. Guess you’ll have that report for me tomorrow instead of today since it’s already 5:30?

But even as email becomes more solidified as the ubiquitous communication vehicle in the workplace, there still doesn’t seem to be an accepted standard of business email practices. With everyone following their own email instincts messages get bungled, feelings hurt, and lots of time is spent going back and forth to clarify, amend, confirm, and respond. Email is supposed to make work life more efficient, but unless it is used thoughtfully and consistently with effective communication practices in place it can prove a time- and brain-drain instead.

Here are some communication practices you may want to incorporate into your work emails to make sure your message is received effectively and efficiently:

Send only to necessary recipients

You don’t want to be that guy whose name shows up in everyone’s inbox and no one ever opens it because you send too many unnecessary emails. To avoid a reputation for over-emailing irrelevant materials, email only those who must be included for that specific message. The same goes for replying. It is not necessary to Reply All on group emails. Reply only to those recipients for whom your reply is necessary.

Make your subject line work

Make people happy by letting them know exactly what your email is about. This way they can prioritize it, know what to expect, and know what the urgency level is for responding. Be specific. Good examples: Important Update to Customer Relations Protocol; Mandatory Meeting for Sales Reps Today; Need Your Help to Plan Conference. Bad examples: Hi; Update; FYI; Ideas?; Sales Reps; Meeting; Conference; Help.

Keep your subject in check

Don’t slip extra information into an email that doesn’t have to do with the subject line. This information could get missed because it is out of context. Instead, send a separate email with an appropriate subject line to that topic.

Address your recipients by name

Nothing gets a person’s attention like calling out his or her name. A guy I know who likes to tell stories calls out people’s names throughout the telling as if to be sure they are paying attention. I was playing golf the other day, Dan, and you know what I saw, Linda? An alligator. That’s right, Bill. An alligator. Yes, it’s annoying in that case, but I will say he does hold everyone’s attention. So start your email by addressing your recipients so they have their ears perked up ready to give full attention to your message. This is especially helpful later in the message with action items for more than one person. For example: Linda, please call corporate by noon tomorrow to get the latest numbers. Dan, review the site analysis one last time and then send to Acme Printing to make twenty copies.

Keep the tone professional

Recently I was in the position of having to break the news to an employee who works remotely that she had made a pretty big mistake. Her response was OMG! Texting acronyms should not be used in a professional email. Younger employees may need a crash course in professional communication, so to avoid unprofessional text talk in company email consider giving new employees a list of email standards.

Let clarity be your guiding force

Even though a friendly demeanor is always appreciated in the workplace, err on the side of cold clarity over casual banter in emails. If your message is cloaked in jokey or chummy language, it will lose its effectiveness. Make your message clear by using specific points broken into small paragraphs with white space in between so your points are quickly and easily digested by your recipient. Be concise so that extraneous stories and wordiness do not detract from your message. If action needs to be taken by the reader, make sure the action is clearly identified as such and is clearly and specifically spelled out, including steps and deadlines if appropriate.

Attach first

Get in the habit of attaching proper attachments before you write your message so that you don’t forget to attach before sending.

Think twice about humor

Like a lot of people, I have a sarcastic side. Sometimes it comes across playfully in emails, but sometimes it doesn’t and instead of looking witty I look like a complete jerk. So much of humor and jaunty sarcasm depends on body language, and when your only recourse for body language is using those emoticons I mentioned earlier you’re a bit limited. So instead of sharing your snarky personality with co-workers via email, save it for the water-cooler when they can tell by your physical demeanor whether you are serious or teasing. Teasing tones are best left out of email, especially work emails. They can so easily be misconstrued and sometimes in an effort to correct them we can put our feet even further in our mouths.

Proofread

Avoid all opportunities for co-workers or clients not to take you seriously and dismissing your message as a result. This includes using correct grammar, spelling, and writing that is clear and concise.

Hopefully these tips will help you love email, too, or at least keep your inbox a little less cranky. When email becomes unwieldy or underlying negativity seems to be lurking between the lines stop the madness of that particular exchange. Pick up the phone or even go see the person face-to-face. The human voice is a powerful thing: it cuts to the chase and keeps folks honest. No matter what mode of communication you are using, always be clear and be respectful or people’s time and efforts and your co-workers will be receptive to your message.

Kenneth McCall is director of IT for storage.com. He builds the systems that help customers find the best self storage units for their needs. Through Kenneth’s and his team’s work customers can find self storage in Philadelphia and other cities. In his spare time, Kenneth likes to bike and participate in outdoor activities.

* Images courtesy of ksablan

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s note: This is a guest from Lisa H. (aka RunningBear) of Getting to Zen

What makes my boss so great is that he treats his employees like human beings and not like resources that are there just to help him achieve his goals. Although he is my manager, everything that I do for him feels collaborative (even my performance reviews).

As I was scouring the internet to increase my understanding of boss-employee relationships, I came across a hypothetical note a boss wrote to his employees. What I liked most about note was that it provided great insight on how to establish a good relationship with your boss from a boss’s perspective. I liked the idea so much that I decided to write one of my own.

To: (insert your name)

From: Your Boss

RE: Welcome

Hello (insert your name),

I would like to take this opportunity to welcome you to the company. I am looking forward to working you. My hope is that this letter will give you a better understanding of who I am, what I need from you and how we both can effectively work together

1. I am under a lot of pressure from upper management, of which most of it you don’t see. Please, don’t hesitate to do or say something that would make my job easier. Most days I am working a minimum of 10 to 14 hours. And although I am compensated for it, it is a lot of hard work with rewards that don’t always pay off quickly.
2. Your work is important to me but so is everyone else’s. Please remember that I also have the concerns and feelings of other employees both inside and outside of our company.
3. I may not have been given the training I needed before being named to this supervisory position. As a result, I have had to learn through trial and error; sometimes at your expense. Please give me the same understanding that you would like from me when you make mistakes.
4. If I am about to do something that could be harmful to my job, please tell me. I may not see an impending disaster that you do. I would rather hear it from you than in the form of a pink slip from the Human Resource department.
5. Tell me what you need to be happy at work. I am not a mind reader. I want to create an environment in which we both can succeed. Let me know what your career goals are and we can work together to create a plan to achieve them.
6. If you don’t know the answer to something, don’t make one up. I use the information you give me to make decisions that impact our business in ways that you may unaware of. I don’t expect you to know everything, but I do expect the truth.
7. If you were a former co-worker of mine, please understand that as your manager I have to evaluate your performance. I hope that my managerial responsibilities will not change our relationship. Sometimes being a manager is lonely.
8. I would appreciate if you would respect my time by not coming to me at 5:30 PM with a critical issue that could have been discussed at any time during that day. I understand that emergencies happen but when they happen every day it’s not an emergency.
9. I expect you to take initiative. If you keep running things by me, I’m going to wonder why I have you around.
10. Let me know when I am doing a good job. I want to be the best manager that I can and feedback is essential for my improvement.
11. Just because I am your manager doesn’t mean that you can’t invite me to lunch. I have other interests besides work and like to talk about them too.

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me, my door, in-box and instant messenger is always open. Again, I look forward to working with you.

Your Boss

Now wouldn’t a letter like this be a welcomed edition to the hiring packet? What would you have liked to hear from your boss when you started working at your company?

Lisa H. (aka RunningBear) is the founder of Getting to Zen, a personal development blog featuring articles on productivity, motivation, inspiration and organization. You can sign up for her RSS feed or follow her on Twitter.

* New things are happening at Work Happy Now. We are gearing up for some big changes, so stay tuned. We are trying to align your needs with our own. It’s how businesses are built. Too many people keep doing the same thing that made them successful two years ago. We don’t want to be that kind of company. So we are taking a proactive approach to work happiness.

If you found this post insightful, you will probably like these too:

• 5 Ways to Improve Your Attitude and Productivity
• 10 Common Career Mistakes

Image courtesy of splorp

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s note: This is a guest post by Eileen Habelow, Ph.D. of Randstad

You work with them about 8 hours a day, 250 days out of the year. Depending on your line of work, you may see them more than you see friends and family. Your co-workers are an integral part of your ability to do your job, to develop and succeed in your career and even to ensure your day-to-day happiness. In this year’s Randstad Work Watch survey on coworker relationships, 70 percent of respondents said that workplace friendships create a more supportive and friendly workplace. That’s why building healthy, trusting relationships with these people is so important.

I am not suggesting intimate and lifelong friendships, but rather relationships based on mutual respect and a foundation of trust. We are often very different from the people we work with, and therefore a close and comfortable friendship is not always in the cards. This is perfectly alright and often ideal for business as diversity facilitates problem-solving, collaboration, ingenuity and business stability. Imagine if everyone was like you and there were no bossy overachievers or quirky IT guys. Who would make sure every deadline was met and the company’s computer system didn’t crash?

Acknowledging and accepting your coworkers’ differences is the first step in developing a healthy work environment. The second is figuring out how to develop trusting relationships despite those differences. Here are a few ways to develop trust with even the most difficult coworkers.

Be Authentic

Healthy relationships are founded on trust and an understanding of who the other person is. People can sense when you’re trying to be someone you’re not, and that façade will put people on their guard. It is hard to work with someone whose personality you can’t predict or whose character you can’t put your finger on. Remember to be yourself, especially in situations when you might be less comfortable – that’s when we are most likely to put up a front.

View Work as a Team Effort

Often coworker relationships can be ridden with competitive tension. It is important to receive credit for the great work you are doing, but it doesn’t have to be at another’s expense. Taking all the credit can feel like a stab in the back to a coworker and create distrust. Next time you have a “big win” at the office, consider whether or not it was achieved single-handedly. Most likely you had some help along the way and those people would appreciate recognition as well.

Deliver on Promises

Coworkers depend on each other to complete tasks and meet deadlines. Following through for a coworker helps the success of the team and should be taken just as seriously as a promise made to a superior. If you feel like you are taking on more than you can handle, let your coworker know and work together to establish a new plan of action. By failing to follow through you not only let your coworker down, but also you establish a record of unreliability.

Trust Them

You cannot expect people to trust you if you don’t trust them back. Take a moment and reflect on your workplace relationships. Are you distrusting? See if any of the above scenarios apply to your coworkers. Are you having trouble reading someone? Did a coworker take all the credit for a group project or let you down on a tight deadline? If so, see if you can make amends or give them another chance to prove their reliability.

We try our best to surround ourselves with trusting relationships in our personal lives. Why shouldn’t we do the same in our professional lives? Think about those people in your life who have helped you develop, succeed and live happily. Chances are they are people with whom you share mutual trust and respect. Why not develop the same type of friendships at work?

Eileen Habelow, Ph.D., is the senior vice president of Organizational Development with Randstad, a global provider of HR solutions and staffing.

-

* Need a boost to your work happiness? Then check out the Happy at Work Project and start one yourself.

If you found this post insightful, you will probably like these too:

> Work Happiness Tip – Tag Your Co-Worker

> I Don’t Try to Motivate Myself

Image courtesy of Todd Baker

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s Note: This is a guest post by Phil LeNir of CoachingOurselves.com. As many of you noticed I’ve been writing more from a personal view of careers and personal development. I published this piece on organizational development because anyone can apply these concepts to their business and life.

There are a lot of management development training programs out there. They help managers and employees to improve their skill sets and become better at what they do.

But what if there was a way to apply self-help concepts to the corporate world? What if managers could train each other, learn through discussions, and be inspired by stimulating material?

Keep reading to find out how we found ourselves doing exactly that.

Let’s go back to the beginning…

We had just hit rock bottom. After three rounds of layoffs, the company off-shored our software development to Eastern Europe, and our competitor acquired us.

That sounds pretty dire doesn’t it? We knew we needed to do something to boost morale and we needed a solution that didn’t cost much. We literally had no time, no money, and we were expected to change quickly.

Luckily when I approached professor Henry Mintzberg, the author of several management development books, he had an idea. He suggested I read his book “Managers not MBAs” and one sentence from this book still sticks with me today:

“Thoughtful reflection on natural experience, in the light of conceptual ideas, is the most powerful tool we have for management learning.”

So instead of having more crisis meetings, planning meetings, and status meetings… my team and I got together for a learning meeting with the goal of making things better.

During that first meeting we made the objective to learn something new about management, and to reflect on our own experience in light of conceptual ideas. If it worked, then we’d do it again.

There was one caveat: I didn’t want people to come to these meetings to talk about grand ideas on how to change things, but leave without intending to put anything into practice.

I didn’t want to fall into the self-help trap of talking about our feelings but not doing anything about them.

During the weekends I worked on the content of the sessions, by editing and crafting the material that Henry Mintzberg and his colleagues had put together for their Masters level management courses. It included lots of provocative questions and exercises to get the meetings to stimulate change.

Amazingly, it worked.

These meetings created a space where our team could come together to make important management decisions, to bond, and to help each other grow.

Suddenly, we weren’t the head of engineering talking to the head of QA anymore. We were simply human beings doing their best to get on with the job of managing, solving problems, and making things happen.

The Result?

We started coming up with new initiatives on both small and large scales that we actually following through on. You can probably relate to meetings where lots of ideas are discussed but nothing ever comes of them.

This was different because we came up with simple changes in a safe environment that fostered collaboration between managers.

Once we started taking action, we saw the time we spent in these meetings differently. This is how I marketed the meetings to my team (because really, who wants to attend more meetings when there is so little time to begin with):

“We all spend some 50+ hours a week running around making things happen, and doing things. Imagine if we spent 1 hour a week talking about what’s going on, reflecting on experiences around our current management challenges, and discussing what we could do to make things better, all stimulated by some really cool management topics developed by some of the best thinkers in the world? Then we could run around making things happen for the other 49 hours. Do you think we might get more done during the 49 hours than the original 50 hours?”

We had stumbled upon management development that really works. And it was just a matter of opening up to each other, putting our heads together, and then taking action. This was like reading a great self-help book, doing all of the exercises, and actually living differently. Wow!

The Three Step Formula

Now it’s time for you to take action with these ideas in your own organization.

Here’s the simple 3-step formula:

Step 1. Schedule a meeting with fellow managers and team members to discuss the issues that are most pressing. If we’re talking about case studies, or potential situations it’s not application and no one will get anything out of it. Make it relevant, make it actionable.

Step 2. Find some materials that relate to the issues at hand: strategic theories, advice for office politics, models of communication between silos and slabs. Once you’ve got some stimulating material, tease some questions out of it to act as starting points during your meeting.

Step 3. During the meeting allow everyone a chance to voice their opinions, and take notes on the interesting ideas that bubble up. Make the meeting a safe place for people to share their experience as managers, to come together to explore new ways of solving problems together. Then after the meeting, follow up by taking action on the new ideas.

What will this three-step process do that a self-help book won’t? It will get you talking to other people who share a similar background; it will boost morale, and make your entire operation run much smoother.

This works because companies are made up of people, not cogs. Unless we take the time to talk about things, we’re going to keep running around inefficiently.

How You Can Apply This to Your Work

It’s simple, put together a few questions to help you and some team members mastermind together.

Then set aside some uninterrupted time to discuss. It might take a few minutes before everyone warms up to each other and begins to share the deep stuff within. The first few meetings might be focused more on surface issues.

Over time you will see that having these types of candid conversations, and knowing that everyone else is in the same boat together, can really transform the way you live your life and lead your team.

So go ahead, I challenge you to give this “self-help for managers” idea a try. It may seem overly simple, but why complicate things when there’s an inexpensive solution at hand that works?

Let us know what you think in the comments! I’d love to see what kinds of results people get from this!

Phil LeNir developed CoachingOurselves following a new approach to management education implemented in the International Masters Program in Practicing Management. As Executive Director at CoachingOurselves, Phil is working to bring this approach to management development to organizations worldwide. Follow Phil and CoachingOurselves on twitter.

-

* Join over 1,100 people who have already subscribed to the FREE 10 part E-Course on Leveraging Your Superpowers. Learn how to discover and leverage your superpowers so you can do amazing work. (Sign up is in the top left corner)

* When we are trying to create a career/business of our dreams we can get lost in the work. Jonathan Fields wrote brilliant piece dissecting why a well known blogger gave up blogging. We have to know our needs so we know how to grow our brand and income.

If you enjoyed this post then you will probably like these too:

> 21 Reasons a Smart Small Business Coach is Worth the Money

> The Secrets to Workplace Leadership

Image courtesy of thinkpanama

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

How much does your fear hold you back from doing work you love?

Building a business is not easy. There is crying, yelling, fighting with your arch nemesis, losing your superpowers, gaining them back again, more yelling, wanting to throw in the towel, feeling like you are on top of the world, and knowing everything that you do is worth your efforts.

I’ve been working hard behind the Work Happy Now scenes.

I want to help you with the resistance that you have in starting your own business or taking your business to the next level. Nathan Hangen and I have created an e-course that helps people do just that.

We’re calling it Fear to Fuel – Stop Resisting and Start Creating.

Too often we procrastinate on stuff that really lights our fires because we are afraid of failing at something we truly care about.

Building Interest

Right now we are building interest by releasing 1 part of 9 PDF modules as a free preview. We plan to release an audio interview by a best-selling author by mid-week, and at the end of the week we’ll make the PDF action worksheet ready for you.

Click here to sign up so you can get access to all the free content. After Friday we will be pulling the information down because we want people to buy the e-course.

What’s Inside

The e-course is filled with great stuff to help you leverage your superpowers so you can do more of the stuff you love to do.

Interviews

We interviewed 14 creative experts and asked them tough questions about what they did right and wrong as they built their businesses.

The list is truly amazing. We have Tony Hsieh the CEO of Zappos, Hugh Macleod the amazing cartoonist at Gaping Void, and Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project to name a few.

Action Sheets

Each interview comes along with an action sheet that highlights the interview. After you are done listening to the MP3, you can answer some tough questions to help you break through your procrastination.

9 PDF Modules

We created 9 PDF modules that will take you step by step through your fear, teach you how to know where it’s coming from, give you strategies on how to friend your fear, and then help you learn to use your fear to fuel you into action.

Marketing Module

Finally, we created a marketing module. Nathan and I talked about what very few others do – that there is no magic formula for success. It takes a lot of hard work, connecting with the right people and showing up every day. Once people know that they can trust you, that’s when the magic happens. They will tell everyone they know that you are awesome.

Where Porcupines Come In to Play

We picked the topic of fear because it dominates so many of our decisions. Think about the last crappy job you stayed at. Why did you stay?

Because you were afraid of finding a crappier job.

Because you would lose your health insurance.

Because you were afraid of change.

All valid arguments, but so very weak at the same time. Your fear holds you back from doing work that you love.

It’s like hugging a porcupine. You think you can do it gently enough that it won’t prick you. Each time you hug that porcupine, a loose quill jabs you. You pick the porcupine up the next day hoping for better results.

You keep showing up at your job because you’re hoping that one day you will stop being pricked and start being appreciated.

Your fear is holding you back. You aren’t creating something that excites you. Then this course is for you.

Partnership

I partnered with Nathan Hangen because we’ve both struggled with fear and found different ways to use that fear to fuel our businesses. We try something, fail try something else and succeed. Then repeat the things that worked.

We’ve tried so many angles that we know what works best for us. Each failure helps us gain clarity.

Right Now

We are giving away a small piece of the course for free, so we can show you how valuable the whole Fear to Fuel package is. Click here to sign up and you’ll get access to each new part that is released. The first part will be released today. The next 2 parts will be released later this week.

As always if you have any questions, just let me know and I’ll be glad to help.

* No extra links today because that’s how important Fear to Fuel is to me.

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Susan Chambers of SAGE Editing and Research Services.

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unjustified, unreasoning terror which paralyzes needed effort…”  (Franklin D. Roosevelt, 1^st Inaugural Address, 1933)

Did you know that 12% of Canadians (source: Canadian Mental Health Association) and 18% of American adults ages 18 and older are diagnosed with an anxiety disorder in a given year (source: National Institute of Mental Health)  When you convert the abstract numbers to real people, these findings translate as a distressingly large number of individuals suffering the often debilitating impacts of fear and anxiety; health concerns, a sense of being overwhelmed and helpless, an inability to take action or make changes, and a reduced quality of life.  My guess is that it was in fact the side effects of overpowering fear, the “…nameless, unjustified, unreasoning terror which paralyzes needed effort…” rather than the emotion of fear itself that concerned Roosevelt, back in 1933.

According to an article in Psychology Today by Gordon Livingston (2009), a psychiatrist, the inaction that stems from excessive, irrational fears or fear-based thinking often shows up as a decision to live life from a “safe” position and not take risks, even if that means forsaking opportunities that might provide greater joy and expansiveness to one’s life.  But what are these fears—or perhaps more accurately, anxieties—that keep so many of us immobilized to some degree or another?  How are they triggered? And how do we overcome our fears or at least control them so they don’t take over and imprison our spirits and minds, leaving us depressed and further discouraged (a loss of heart)? Let’s start with human nature and the nature of fear.

Fear, what is it good for?

Fear is defined as the emotional response to an actual or perceived threat of immediate or imminent danger or pain.  The capacity to experience fear is part of human nature that has been hard-wired into us.  From an evolutionary perspective, fear served a valuable purpose in assuring our survival as a species.  When confronted with a threat to our survival, we did what was needed to avert or avoid the danger; we either ran (flight) or defended ourselves (fight) if there was a chance of overcoming our attacker. When it’s functioning normally, our friend fear serves us well when it comes to ensuring our continued survival.  An appropriate “dose” of fear stops most of us from taking fool-hardy chances that would endanger ourselves or others.  Used constructively, a little bit of fear or caution can help us to assess and manage any risks before going into a situation we’re not sure about.  (It’s called a calculated risk for good reason.) A sense of wariness or our good old “gut feelings” can give us a heads up about an impending threat or problem so we have time to either avert or minimize a potentially challenging situation—if we’re tuned into that quiet little voice and treat it with respect.

Where our memory recall of emotions is concerned, our brains don’t bother with linear time, nor do they distinguish between real and imaginary events.  This means we can endlessly replay past incidents that scared us and elicit the exact same feelings and physiological response two or twenty years later if we do not find a healthy way to process or neutralize the emotional charge attached to the episode. It means we can also take those same memories and start generalizing them to similar or future situations, with the unhappy result that we become increasingly fearful and avoid events, people or activities we perceive as threatening to our emotional well-being.

It turns out that fear and anxiety can also be learned and passed on to future generations.  According to Livingston (2009), children who grow up with parents who show a lot of anxiety or apprehensiveness, or who convey an exaggerated sense of the world as a dangerous place, are themselves more likely to develop unreasonable fears as they grow up.  T is easy to see how quickly successive generations within a family could experience generalized anxieties and fears but might not make the link as to how they came to be more anxious than their peers.  Yet knowing and understanding this information could potentially liberate any number of individuals from resigning themselves to a narrow life constrained by fear.

Livingston states that an overly fearful view of the world is also fueled in large measure by our media and how 24 hour news shows report both local and global events, and he points specifically to the emotional impact of news stories which “seem designed more to alarm than inform.”  The overall effect is that our news media seem to be infecting our society with anxiety and conditioning us to accept fear, and I would add helplessness, as normal emotional states.  We have, in essence, become a culture of fear—one in which, Livingston points out, we scare ourselves silly over phantom worries rather than using those fears to galvanize us into facing and resolving the real threats to our well-being.

If we can’t be fearless, we can always be courageous

We tend to equate bravery and courage with being fearless, but this is both unhelpful and inaccurate.  It’s unhelpful because it asks us to deny part of our emotional make-up and hardwiring, and achieve something that is not possible or even advisable.  It is an incorrect equation.  The very individuals we look to as exemplary role models of bravery or courage openly admit that they were not free of fear when they faced grave threats.  They simply kept going with their plan of action, in spite of feeling scared, because they were generally resolute in their decisions, knew the risks attached to what they were doing and in many cases (e.g., Mahatma Gandhi and Nelson Mandela) believed that their actions served a larger cause for a greater good.  Here’s what General George S. Patton had to say about equating bravery with a lack of fear: “If we take the generally accepted definition of bravery as a quality which knows no fear, I have never seen a brave man.  All men are frightened.  The more intelligent they are, the more they are frightened.”  Both Nelson Mandela and Mark Twain also observed that courage is about mastering or resisting fear, not the absence of fear.

But not all philosophers agree with the idea that we need to conquer or resist our fear.  According to J. Krishnamurti,

What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing

or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means watch it, learn

about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not

how to escape from it.”

Krishnamurti’s advice seems both counter-productive and counter-intuitive at first glance, yet it makes a lot of sense on further reflection.  What happens when we try to run away from something?  It usually follows us.  What happens if we try to resist or control something by force?  We exhaust ourselves or create conflict when we go into control mode.

We can decide that it’s okay to have fear—after all it is a part of the human condition—it doesn’t mean we have to define ourselves by our fear.  Who knows, maybe if we choose to just let our fear be and have compassion for it rather than revile it, if we sit with it, experience it, and learn from it, it may just lessen its hold on us more gracefully than if we struggle to conquer or vanquish our fears.  In any case, sitting quietly, observing and learning causes us considerably less suffering than the energy required for fight or flight and perhaps we will learn something valuable in the process.

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with five strategies and short quotes for working with and through fear.  I’ve used these strategies at various times in my life and found them to be incredibly helpful.  May they inspire and encourage you to find the courage within yourself.

Five strategies for working with and through fear

1.  “Let the fear of a danger be a spur to prevent it; [s]he that fears not, gives the advantage to danger.” (Benjamin Disraeli)

Are you feeling wary about a situation or an individual that you interact with?  Or do you have a vague sense that something has changed ever so slightly, but not in a good way? Honour the little tugs of fear and the subtle perceptions you’re receiving.  Listen to them and what they say they’re based on.  Thank them for the heads up, figure out your plan to prevent or minimize the danger you’ve been warned of and proceed with appropriate caution. Talk them through with a trusted confidant or two; don’t dismiss your feelings just because others are maybe not as sensitive to subtle shifts, but consider their input as helpful information or facts that add to a balanced picture before you make a decision. Be observant to the subtleties in your interactions and your life and learn to appreciate your built in early warning system.  It’s there for a reason.

2.  “Listen to what you know instead of what you fear.” (Richard Bach)

If the fears are being driven by self-doubts about your abilities to succeed in realizing a dearly held dream (starting a business, expressing your creativity) and yet you know objectively that you have the skills or talent to follow through, talk to your doubts or self criticisms, ask them what purpose they think they are serving by holding you back through the use of fear.  If they can’t tell you anything helpful, ignore them and find another place within yourself that supports you, reminds you of your competencies, and encourages you to persist in your dreams.

3.  “The media… bear some responsibility for stoking our worry. …many stories seem designed more to alarm than inform.”(Gordon Livingston, 2009)

If you find your fears are being shaped by mass media and the news, go on a news fast (Yes, that means online sources of news, too.).  Use the time to learn or relearn how to think critically and independently.  Learning to ask tough questions about the information we read or hear will strengthen your intellectual and emotional immunity to being manipulated, getting caught up in group-think or getting swept up by mass media produced moral panics.

4.  “There are very few monsters who warrant the fear we have of them (Andre Gide)

Do your fears and anxieties feel like they are monster sized and just as scary? Yes? We often give our fears far too much power by perceiving them to be much bigger than they really are, so shrink them down to size.  Draw your fears on a piece of paper, but keep them on the small side, and have fun making your fears seem as ridiculous and non-threatening as possible in your drawing.  Draw yourself standing tall—much taller than your fears—confident and empowered.  Keep the piece of paper where you can see it to remind you that you are bigger than your fears.

5.  “When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable….” (Henry David Thoreau)

Make up a chant or song and sing it when you start feeling afraid.  Use the song to en-courage you—to awaken the courage that does exist within you.  I personally enjoy listening to Deva Premal’s version of a Sanskrit mantra for surrendering fear, but go with whatever works best for your spiritual path, appeals to you and fills you with inner strength and calm.

Sue Chambers writes about empowering the clarity of your message, social issues and the environment at sdc-sage-editing.com/sdc-sagewit.  If you enjoyed this article, you may also like to subscribe to her blog.

* Don’t miss out on any more great articles. Sign up for my RSS feed or email feed and you’ll stay updated on the latest tips and ideas to bring more happiness to your working life.

* Kelly Parkinson wrote an awesome post about the importance of making your people feel special. If you don’t make your people feel loved they won’t come back. She uses the Ponderosa restaurant chain as an example. I used to love going to Ponderosa for the all you can eat ice cream. Where are they now?

If you enjoyed this post then you will probably like these too:

> A Simple Guide to Overcoming Project Resistance

> The Law of Attraction and Your Career

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Eileen Habelow and Randstad

Nothing can disrupt a productive day at the office like inconsiderate colleagues.  It seems no matter how hard we try, they always find ways – mostly unintentional – to disrupt your workday “mojo.”  While there are extreme cases of workplace irritation (back-stabbing, taking credit for other’s work), it’s the little, irritating habits of co-workers that seem to regularly get under our skin.  According to a recent Randstad Work Watch survey on workplace pet peeves, 43 percent of people are most annoyed with their co-workers’ poor time management skills.

In this current economic climate, we have all taken on more responsibility and have been asked to do more with fewer resources. So, it’s easy to understand why we would expect our colleagues to work efficiently, maximizing the time spent in the office each day.  The last thing anyone wants is to watch – or deal with – a neighbor in the next cubicle wasting valuable time on menial activities or struggling to complete assignments due to wasted or mismanaged time.

So what irks us the most about other’s poor time management skills?  The survey found that 22 percent of respondents listed excessive breaks, including long lunches, smoke breaks and online surfing as their chief aggravation.  Who hasn’t worked through lunch (or late) to meet a deadline only to be put in a holding pattern because the person who is responsible for that one final piece of the puzzle is… on a long coffee break?!

Abuse of breaks may be the biggest peeve regarding time management, but it’s certainly not the only one.  Other frustrations expressed by workers include abuse of sick days, meetings lacking structure/agendas, people who text or check their Blackberry during meetings, people who miss deadlines (see above), and meetings that run into personal time or start late/run over.  No matter the level of annoyance, each of these workplace distractions can ultimately impact a company’s bottom line in addition to personal productivity.

What else bothers us at work?

Gossip, the ever-present office activity, ranked as the second most popular workplace pet peeve followed by messiness in communal spaces.  Interestingly, when Randstad conducted its original pet peeves survey in 2007, gossip topped the list.  Are we becoming numb to office chit-chat or are the economic occurrences of the past two years impacting what annoys us?  It’s something to think about.  Regarding messiness, leaving dirty dishes in the sink, failing to restock supplies or leaving conference rooms unkempt may seem like no big deal to some, but remember that a clean, organized office can go a long way toward creating a pleasant place to work – not to mention create a good first impression to clients who may be visiting your office.

Surprisingly, what doesn’t seem to bother us during work hours is the amount of time spent on social media sites.  Perhaps it’s because social media is such an integral part of our culture that we don’t see it as a problem, or we work for companies that have adopted social media policies that forbid use during work hours. Whatever the case, only 12 percent of survey respondents indicated it as their biggest workplace pet peeve.  Some may see value in jumping on Facebook or Twitter throughout the day as a way to de-stress or refocus, such as when you’ve hit a mental block.   Others may frequent social media sites as a way to become better-rounded in their jobs. Whatever the reason, it’s best to know your company’s social media policy before spending too much time on any site.

Deal with pet peeves, but do it with respect

What is the best way to overcome these daily irritants while retaining your sanity and your positive outlook, not to mention rapport with your colleagues?  There seem to be as many options as peeves themselves.  In most instances, according to the Work Watch survey, workers typically deal with their peeve by saying something directly to the person involved – 29 percent felt it the best course of action.  And the next best solution for dealing with or responding to a pet peeve?  Vent to co-workers…roughly 20 percent of workers take this course of action.  More than a quarter of respondents just ignore the situation completely.  Depending on your personality, ignoring the situation could teach you patience; but if ignoring the problem is causing you to be increasingly unhappy, resolving the problem may be your best course of action.

What don’t seem to be popular methods of defusing a situation are emailing the culprit directly, saying something to a supervisor or leaving an anonymous note.

However you decide to address the problem, approach the matter in a respectful tone.  If the offender is a genuinely open person who can handle a frank discussion about what is bothering you, approach them in a friendly manner. If you are uncertain how a colleague may react to your feedback, one way to address may be to put yourself in their shoes. How would you most favorably receive the news that your daily habits are making others unhappy? More often than not, we tend to be unaware of the little things we do, and would be genuinely sorry for annoying others, if only someone would tell us.

It’s a reality of the working world that we now live in – spending so much time with others is bound to expose what some may view as habits and others as pet peeves.  How you choose to deal (or not deal) with the little things that drive you nuts can make the difference in that workplace “mojo.”

Eileen is currently the senior vice president of Organizational Development with Randstad, the world’s 2nd largest provider of HR solutions and staffing. Eileen is responsible for leading efforts in training and development, performance management, leadership development, HR consulting, and diversity.

* It’s Spread-the-Love Day, when I encourage you to spread the word about Work Happy Now. You might:
> Forward the link to someone you think would be interested
> Link to a post on Twitter (follow me @workhappynow)
> Sign up for my FREE 10 Week E-Course and join over 800 people who have already improved their happiness at work. You will also receive a bi-monthly newsletter that gives you great tips and ideas on how to improve your career.
> Put a link to the blog in your Facebook status update
Thanks! I really appreciate any help. Word of mouth is the BEST.

* Crystal of the Big Bright Bulb asked questions about community building that many bloggers need to ask. The comments are the best part.

If you enjoyed this post then you will probably like this one too:

> 9 Ways to Overcome Work Annoyances

> 5 Ways to Conquer Your Fears

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Wendy Graham of online colleges.

If you work from home or attend online college, you know the importance of keeping productive; while working from the comfort of your house may seem like the best of all possible work environments, it can have its drawbacks. For one, you must have strong reserves of self-discipline and treat your work life as it were… a job. This can be difficult if one uses the same home computer for work and leisure. If this applies to you, consider the following programs.

Organize and color-code your notes and tasks with Notekeeper

I have tried many free and shareware PIMs (personal information managers) but I use Notekeeper the most. It is simple and is designed for maximum efficiency not only for documentation but for finding information quickly. You can organize your notes into groups, and the ability to add tags to each ensures the ability to cross-references anything from the fruits of online research to a simple to-do list. I find being able to add a color bar to each note particularly useful. You can track your information at a glance.

Watch your time with WatchMe

WatchMe is a simple, free program that sets a timer in the background and will alert you at a defined time. What makes this program so effective is its small footprint and how well it does what it is designed to do: no extra bells or whistles are included that you don’t want or need. You can define multiple tasks, each with its own timer, and set it up to add the total time. Timestamps can be exported into XML or CSV format or simply cut and paste into another program or document. I particularly like that it runs as a standalone .exe on the desktop with no installation required. If you are looking for a robust, but pared down time program, WatchMe is worth trying.

Manage your projects by task and time with Slimtimer

Slimtimer is an efficient and surprisingly feature-packed tool that will allow you to break your various projects into individual categories of tasks- both personal and business. You can set a timer for each task to see how long it takes you. You can also run reports to keep track of your projects and overall use of time when working. This tool is a godsend for collaborative projects or to keep track of billing.

Keep your eyes on the prize with k9webprotection

It happens to the best of us. We begin work with the best of intentions, but decide we will take ‘just a quick peek’ at our Twitter feed, etc. Before you know it, hours have passed, even if you feel like you have “worked.” If you can’t stay away from the social network sites during work hours, let k9webprotection.com be your ‘bad cop.’ Designed to filter web content, it can also be used to block access to certain sites during pre-defined times.

It took some time, but I am now more efficient working out of my home office than I ever was working in a cubicle!

This guest post was written by Wendy Graham, a stay at home mother and freelancer who often writes about education for Online College Guru, a directory of online colleges.

* Are you on Twitter? Then join over 3,300 people who get my stress relief tips, happiness ideas, and thought provoking quotes. @workhappynow

* Jason over at Escape Adulthood wrote a cool piece about living in the present moment. Click here to read the whole article.

If you enjoyed this post then you will probably like this one too:

> 7 Tips to Overcome the Monday Blues

> Time Management is a Waste of Time

Image courtesy of Rev. Xanatos Satanicos Bombasticos

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!