Archive for the Emotional Tools for Better Working Category
Work Happiness Tip – Keep Track of Your Mood
Every week I like to bring you a work happiness tip that can help improve your mood, relationships, productivity, or reduce your stress. The idea is to put you back in the driver’s seat. This week’s tip: Keep track of your mood.
For a whole month I kept track of my mood and recorded it every morning, afternoon, and night. I added it as a chapter in my soon to be released book.
For a month I rated my mood three times a day to discover how I actually felt. My rating was on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being severely sad and 10 being so amazingly happy that I could barely contain my joy.
I was surprised by the results.
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Love the Pain – Cartoon
Lately I’ve been thinking of the pain that I’ve been through at all my jobs. From co-workers to bosses to tedious tasks. Each experience has helped create me.
There are some days where I miss standing for 8 hours a day checking people’s items out at K-mart. It was a job that wasn’t suited to me at all, but I miss the relationship building that I practiced.
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The 100-100 Divide
In a perfect work environment we give 100% and our company gives 100%. Of course this never happens because we make choices based on how well we think we are treated. If your company didn’t give you a promotion, that you thought you deserved, would you still work as hard the next day?
No?
Wow, big shock.
When your manager/boss sees that you just don’t have the pep that you once had, they also pull back their desire to help you. This creates a divide that leaves everyone searching for answers
You may pull back and only give 75% of your energy, maybe taking slightly longer breaks or surfing Amazon for a new book. Your company wants you to work harder, but they’ve seen this reaction 700 times before and they don’t try to open a conversation to improve the disconnect.
Now that you’ve pulled back to 75% and no one cares, you realize that you can pull back to 50%.
You’re now working at 50% of your capacity because you can. You avoid work on some days and accomplish a lot on others, but on average you are giving 50% of your energy.
Your employer is troubled, but thinks it’s probably just a phase and before they do anything about it they realize that they’ve just created your expectations about what kind of work you need to do to get by.
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January Theme of the Month – Relaxing With My Work
Two weeks ago I did a theme of the week: “More Listening, Less Talking.” It forced me to really listen to what people are saying to me instead of interrupting people before they are done.
My main weakness during that week was that I really wanted to help people finish their sentences because I knew the word that they were trying to use, but couldn’t quite get out.
It was actually a little painful.
I decided to let people have their say and I was amazed by the experience. I tried to open up to each word. It became a meditation. There were a couple of times when I was talking to my Uncle and a friend that I zoned out and I was doing a little too much feeling and not enough listening, but I quickly snapped back so they didn’t even notice.
I realize that the theme of the week is nice, but a couple of readers suggested that I do a monthly theme and break it into focused weeks. So that’s what I’m doing.
Here’s the outline that I’m using…
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How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed
So you’re stressed out and you have too much to complete. What do you do?
Usually someone does the opposite of what they should really do. They try to rush through to get as much done as possible without being aware of their body signals.
This is actually funny to me. I have often seen co-workers making calls, writing an email and planning their night all at the same time they’re rushing to get all their work done and then they complain about feeling stressed out.
Instead of looking at the root cause, they apply topical solutions to the problem. I’ll explain as this article continues.
I’ve actually tried talking to these stressed out people about their habits and all I get are grumpy stares. I’m sure they are addicted to the rush of rushing around. We all love to feel important, making sure our ego gets that daily dose of “oh yeah, that’s why I’m on Earth.”
The problem is that our hearts, minds, and stomachs can’t handle the pressure. No wonder we eat for comfort. We are constantly on the edge trying to bring ourselves back to solid ground.
We need to find other ways to relax with the work that we do without feeling overwhelmed. It’s a mental game that we must all solve for ourselves.
I use 3 techniques that I’ve combined to help me deal with my frustration, plus a bonus idea that has worked well for me:
- Slow your movements for a specified amount of time
- Increase speed slowly
- Be 100% there
* Bonus
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Work Happy Tip – Just Ask
So many of us want people to read our minds, like when we want a co-worker to notice how we are feeling. Life doesn’t work that way.
A few months ago I was feeling blue. The world’s sorrows were just sitting on my shoulders, giggling at my struggle.
A number of factors were contributing to my heavy feelings. I wanted more money. I wanted to buy a gadget that I couldn’t afford. I wanted to feel like a million bucks, but my back was killing me.
I hated the fact that I wanted so many things I couldn’t have.
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Be One With Your Work
I’ve been playing with drawing in relation to work happiness. I’ve found that there are parts of me hidden within a pencil that don’t come out on the keyboard. I’ve been messing with this medium on and off for about 12 years, but in the last year I’ve really been enjoying myself.
I drew this piece when I felt really frustrated after trying to write a blog post. In my head the concept sounded brilliant then it came out of me like a big blob of stink. I was frustrated and wanted to punch my screen.
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Unconventional Guide to Self Acceptance
This post was inspired by Chris Guillebeau’s Unconventional Writing Contest.
What holds you back from accomplishing your dreams?
If you could pin down the one thing that is keeping you from reaching your most glorious dreams where you travel like Chris Guillebeau, make money like Oprah, or work a crowd like Bill Clinton…
What would it be?
Your education?
Your relationships?
Your…
It’s none of those things.
It’s your fear.
The fear within you is holding you back from making your dream life a reality. Now I’m not claiming to know it all; I myself have been guilty of giving in to my fears many times, but the important thing is that I recognize what’s holding me back.
Believe me, even Oprah and Bill Clinton have fears, but the difference between them and us is that they lean into their fears until they aren’t afraid of the fire any longer.
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When Do You Decide Whether or Not You are Happy at Work?
When you just got a raise?
When you had a fight with a co-worker?
When a client tears you a new one because they had a bad day?
When you completed a tough project?
When you slept 4 hours the night before?
There are so many ways to judge our happiness at work, but it really requires a focused mind to reflect and decide on the right things.
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5 Reasons to Stop Trying to be Perfect
Perfection can kill the motivation of the brightest minds. Some people just want every detail to be perfect.
I think perfection is for losers. When you try so hard to make everything perfect, you bind your creativity. Instead of putting out something wonderful, you end up putting out crap that is over processed and boring.
Greatness is not about being perfect. Being great means making mistakes, big mistakes and learning from them.
I wrote this article because I’ve been binding my thoughts and hands, which deflated my confidence. My projects went unfinished.
My presentations will always need improvement. My eShorts will need to look prettier. My teleseminars will need to give more and more value.
That’s the nature of the game. Master car technicians will always come across a problem that they can’t solve. You will have projects that frustrate you.
You need to let go of how you want your project to play out and just do what feels right instead of letting your old habits of perfection lock up your ability to take action.
I put together a list of 5 reasons why you need to stop trying to be perfect.
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