But what about the other kind of boss? The kind who actually treats you like a real human being instead of warm body?

Truly exemplary bosses are few and far between, but the good news is, like true love, they exist. And also like true love, a really remarkable boss might come your way once in a lifetime.

What Makes a Truly Remarkable Boss?

One thing that separates a remarkable boss from an ordinary boss is that they have a personal code of ethics that they stick to, come what may. We’re not talking about the boss who walks around the office in a ‘Save the Whales’ T-shirt, rattling a collection box and singing Kumbayah. But rather the boss who, when the going gets tough, proves that they are worthy of their title of leader.

I’ve been lucky enough to have several truly exceptional bosses in my life. Those bosses embodied leadership, and led by action rather than words. I feel lucky to have met them, and years later, I still count them as an inspiration.

So what makes a truly remarkable boss? Here’s a rundown of lessons I’ve learned from top bosses.

1) Remarkable bosses actually listen to your ideas

New hires usually come to a company bubbling with ideas on how to make things better. Even the old deckhands can be coaxed into revealing a few pearls of wisdom they’ve been nursing over the years.

A great boss is one who gives every employee face time – not just the big players, but also the little guy who makes the coffee — who may have just had a brainstorm on how to make the company a million dollars. The worth of the idea is irrelevant; being taken seriously by your boss is a valuable perk you won’t find listed in the employee handbook.

2)    Remarkable bosses have your back

My first boss earned my undying loyalty during my first week on the job, when he stepped smoothly into the firing line between me and a screaming customer. Was she having a problem? No problem. A free product materialized out of a bag, the customer stopped yelling, everyone went away happy.  I was spared being the newbie who got torn to shreds in front of everyone on her first day.

I never forgot the lesson my boss taught me, which is that a true leader always protects his followers, even if that means taking the heat themselves.

On the polar opposite end of the spectrum, I’ll never forget (or forgive) the boss who, during my first month at a new firm, had me personally do the “letting go” of a popular long-term staff member who had been slacking. The experience itself wasn’t as traumatic as the loathing glares I got from from his co-workers for a few short months after that until I mercifully managed to find a new position.

My boss saved face by asking me to do his dirty work, but in the process he lost my respect for him as a leader. It is easier to hire a new employee than it is to get back the respect of an existing team member you’ve thrown under the bus.

3)    Remarkable bosses practice what they preach

Remarkable bosses lead by example. They don’t see themselves as being above the rules just because they made the rules. If your boss takes you to task for being 5 minutes late while he ambles in around lunchtime reading the paper and holding a breakfast wrap from Panini Garden, he’s sending mixed messages to the team, which can quickly grow into morale-ruining resentment.

The truly remarkable boss acts as if he himself was an employee at his own company. If he asks employees for openness, he may set his desk out in the open, eschewing the traditional office. If he wants his workers to go above and beyond, he will stay late alongside his team and order them pizza when they work overtime on a big project. In doing so, he earns that priceless commodity: his employee’s admiration.

4) Remarkable bosses learn your name and use it often

One thing that both psychologists and the owners of Starbucks have in common: they both know the power our own name holds over us. Call out “Order number 173!” in a bustling coffee shop and you may have to call it five times before the order is picked up. Call out “Suzanne!” and ten bucks says that Suzanne will have her coffee in hand in five seconds.

I once had the demoralizing experience of being laid off by a man who didn’t even know my name after three years working at the company. If it had been a large firm, that might have been forgivable, but we only had 30 employees. And that man was our CEO. Being laid off was bad enough, but being laid off by someone who apparently hadn’t even registered my presence in three years of full time work was nothing short of soul-crushing.

Learning someone’s name equals respect. So memorize your employee’s names, even if you have no direct contact with them. How can you lead your company if you don’t know who you are leading?

5) Remarkable bosses make time for you

The demands of the average workday can push even the calmest of us to the ends of our rope. We get snippy with people, we hunch over our computers and scowl at our bulging physical or email Inboxes, we groan when we get yet another meeting request.

Whenever I find myself starting to bristle at the new hire who has just bumbled up to my desk and is asking me ten thousand questions on my lunch break, I take a deep breath and visualize the welcoming smile my last boss would give me whenever I entered his office. Whether I’d planned a formal meeting or had just shown up unannounced, he would always react the same way. He’d motion me to sit down, give me his full attention, and smile with a gruff, “Now, what can I do for you?”

Maybe I’d walked in just as he was getting ready to leave for lunch. Maybe his Inbox was as scary as mine. The point is, he never let that show. He always made time for me, and in return I always felt like like I could talk to him, no matter what the subject. In any company, large or small, good communication is the cornerstone of a healthy and long-lasting boss-employee relationship.

Some of us are born to be great leaders; others have to work at it. If you are struggling with a boss who may not be treating you with respect, ask yourself this: would I work for this person if I wasn’t being paid to do so? Bosses who treat their employees as they themselves would like to be treated earn their undying loyalty and respect, which can literally make or break a company when times get tough. In this day and age, that is a rare thing indeed.

Your Turn

What was one leadership quality you admired from a present or old boss?

Reyna Ramli is a writer for CareerBliss.com, an online community dedicated to helping people find happiness in the workplace. When Reyna is not writing, she enjoys cooking, working out, and reading fashion blogs and magazines.

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Try making a list of them.

You’ll be surprised by how many different ways you let something distract you from your work.
 

My Top Ten Distractions:

1. Email
2. Espn.com
3. My dog
4. YouTube
5. Facebook
6. Twitter
7. Sunny day
8. Coffee
9. TV
10. Chatting with a friend.

I could easily extend this list to 50 things, but you get the point.

We all have our top 10 or 50 things that can distract us.  Some may be obvious, others insidious.
Case in point, yesterday I was stuck trying to figure out why  a client’s sales page wasn’t working to bring her more business. I couldn’t put my finger on it, so while I was reflecting on the possible reasons, I opened a new tab on my browser.

The new tab defaulted to ESPN. I started reading about basketball, and it wasn’t until 5 minutes had passed that I caught myself. This was all done subconsciously.

I was procrastinating without even realizing it. The Internet is a tricky tool. It can be very thought-provoking, but also very mind-numbing.

Reading about sports wasn’t helping me figure out the problem. It just postponed the solution.

What I know does help me when I’m stuck is a walk or bike ride. While I’m physically active, I get to relax my mind and let my subconscious figure out a solution.

I smiled and as I told my inner arch nemesis that I was on to him, I closed the ESPN browser and took a 20 minute bike ride. After I got back, I knew what was wrong with the sales page — the narrative wasn’t strong enough.

Understanding Your Focus

There is always something that can divert your attention away from your work. It could range from a chat with co-worker to checking your email too often.

The key to overcoming your distractions is to do try the following five things:

1. Make a Clean Break

When your brain has trouble focusing, it could be a variety of things – from fear to overwhelm. You have to create an emotional buffer zone so you can process the emotions that may be subverting your focus on your work, so you first need to pause and mentally acknowledge that you’ve been distracted from your original work goal.

2. Take an Active Relaxation Break

The next step is to take a short Active Relaxation break. That means at least figuratively stepping away and thinking through why you are allowing yourself to be or cannot stop yourself from being distracted.

By taking some time and listening to the conversation running through your head, you can then gain an understanding as to why you are allowing yourself to be distracted instead of focusing on your work.

3. Create a Simple Goal to Accomplish

Now that you understand why you are letting things distract you, you can create a game plan that is small and “doable” enough that it energizes you instead of demotivates you.

Start with baby steps. For example, if you think a certain task will take you two hours, break down those two hours into four 30 minute steps.

4. Eliminate Distractions

Now that you have a game plan, make sure you’re set up for success to stay on task. That means creating an optimal work environment for yourself.

For example, if you’re distracted by the Internet, close all browsers and go to a quiet place (if possible –if not put on headphones and listen to instrumental music). Creating a space conducive to work instead of distractions will help make sure your mindset is optimized for you to do great work.

5. Take Action on your First Baby Step

Acknowledge to yourself when you are ready to take action on that first 30 minute task. I like to set a timer for 30 minutes to help me stay focused on the task. After 30 minutes, I’m usually back in the flow and I just keep working.

Your Turn

What activity do you use to procrastinate on instead of doing your work?

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He stayed home with me last Tuesday and Wednesday. He broke his fever on Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon he was back to his happy self.

On Wednesday night I looked at my “to do” list that had piled up. I felt behind. Overwhelmed. I felt this panicky feeling bubbling up inside me. You probably know that I like to call this my “arch nemesis”. That little negative inner voice that tries to scare the heck out of me every chance he gets.

Take Back Control

Instead of letting my arch nemesis take over I looked at where this stress was coming from. I began to feel like I didn’t choose to stay at home with my son. This made me feel even worse. I was lying to myself to motivate myself to be more focused. It wasn’t working. I was freaking out. I couldn’t focus.

As you know fear isn’t a very good motivator or at least too much of it is bad. There is a difference between good stress (Eustress) and overwhelming stress (distress).

I had a little chat with my arch nemesis. We went for a short walk.

I needed to readjust my attitude. Taking 15 minutes out of my day to do this saved me from wasting hours of work worrying instead of actually getting something accomplished.

Conversation with My Arch Nemesis

Me: “It’s ok to feel behind.”

Arch nemesis: “No it’s not. You have 100 things to do to take your business to the next level.”

Me: “I agree, but who is more important my “little dude” or the work?

Arch nemesis: “I hear you, but…what about the blog post, client call and proposal that you have to do today?”

Me: “They are all at the top of my list. I’ll get it done. I have 4 hours. If you ease up on my a little bit I’ll be able to get a lot more done.”

Arch Nemesis: “Ok, what about the first draft of the landing page you have to write?”

Me: “Number 4 on my list and I’ll get it done. I can only do one thing at a time.”

Arch Nemesis: “Hmmm, what about your ebook that you wanted to outline?”

Me: “That’s going to have to wait until tomorrow.”

Arch Nemesis: “What?! But you were so looking forward to it and once it’s done you can get started on it and that’s going to really help level you up.”

Me: “I know, but we did what was right. Our little dude needed us. Right?”

My Arch Nemesis puts his head down in defeat.

Arch Nemesis: “Ok, you promise to work on it for at least an hour tomorrow?”

Me: “I promise.”

After our conversation was over I felt much better.

It’s amazing what a walk with your inner arch nemesis can do to improve your perspective.

Your Turn

What do you do to bring your “To Do” anxiety back under control?

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Why will you be looking for a new job this year?

Because you don’t feel appreciated, that of course makes you feel unhappy.

You aren’t appreciated because you don’t have enough leverage at work. You haven’t been able to carve out a niche – a place in your company where you are the “go to” person to solve certain problems. This could be because your core values and your company’s core values aren’t in sync. This happens and figuring out how to realign your needs with your company’s will help level up your career.

Becoming a “go to” person at your company isn’t easy, but when this happens you feel needed, appreciated and useful.

That’s what a great career gives you.

Understanding Your Situation

You might not be able to do this at your present company because your values and your company’s values are very different, that’s fine, but that means you have to go someplace else.

This is where the dilemma comes in. You created a B+ mindset. You do good work, but not great work.

Now you want A+ money and A+ type respect. A great career doesn’t work this way.

The best way to develop a great career is to start working with your mindset. When you create the right mindset you are more motivated, make better decisions and engage with your work.

Here are three ways you can turn your mind into a friend that helps your career instead of hurts it.

1.     Watch Your Emotional Patterns

Understand where your motivation wanes when working on a certain type of project. Do you get excited at the beginning of a project, but have trouble finishing it?

If this happens to you, you can work through this or find someone to help you to the finish line. I suggest the latter. Too often we think we have to do everything on our own. You can lean on co-workers to help you finish a project. The key is to make sure you are giving back to them just a little more than they give to you.

2.     Take Five Minutes for Active Relaxation

Many times you may just be going strong and you hit a wall. You can only take a sprint for so long before you get overloaded. It’s why all great marathoners are slow starters. They know their objectives, body and mind, to get the optimal performance out of themselves.

When you see the signs that you are going too hard for too long take five minutes to slow down. I think of this activity as Active Relaxation. Take some deep breaths or go for a short walk. Let your mind clear so you can recharge and do productive work.

3.     Create a Daily Plan

No matter how your day looks. You need to create a plan that energizes you and fits your goals.

That means writing a morning list of everything you want to get done. Then choose the top three projects. Focus on these projects above everything as best as you can. That may mean saying “no” to a few things other people ask of you. Utilizing the 80/20 rule is important to building a great career – 20% of your actions product 80% of your results. Know what actions these are and make sure they get done.

Remember

You need to work on your current career to find work that better fits your superpowers. Once you have a little more leverage at your current career your confidence will go up and you’ll look more attractive to your present company and other companies.

Your Turn

What do you do to ensure that you are creating a positive mindset so you are able to do great work and become the “go to” person in your department?

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You may not feel a connection to your work like you once did. You may not be getting enough sleep. There are many reasons why you may be struggling with your energy level at work.

The key is to look for the underlying issues.

Last week 3 pm struck and I had hit a wall. I literally couldn’t even see straight.

I knew something wasn’t right. Usually I can work late into the day without feeling tired at all.

Then I realized that I hadn’t taken my short walk. I was so busy trying to get stuff accomplished that I forgot my walk.

I jumped up and went for my short walk, but it was too late. My routine was thrown out of whack and I never recovered.

Your “You” Time

Too often, you probably forget to make time for yourself. You don’t take the time to process your thoughts and feelings. You are too busy just trying to get everything done at work that you need to do for the day.

I used to hit the 3 pm wall all the time. Now it’s an infrequent occurrence. Most days, I have enough energy to get everything that I want to done. That’s because I looked at why my energy levels crashed and burned around that 3 pm mark. By taking that short walk, I reenergize both physically and mentally.

Finding time to process your thoughts and emotions is vital to keeping a positive mindset and staying energized at work.

Here are 5 methods you can use to help keep your energy at a high level all day. You should try to use these methods on a daily and weekly basis. Working on your daily mindset is probably the biggest impact you can have on bringing more energy to your work.

1. Gratitude Journal

Keep a daily gratitude journal. This will allow you to focus on the positive experiences in your life. Jot down 3 positive experiences that happen to you at the end of each day.

2. Exercise

Find a way to move your body every single day. You can play your favorite song and dance like a wild person around your home. You can go for a bike ride or just take a simple walk. Even doing some simple stretching exercises will help. Exercise will help you increase the endorphins to your brain, which energizes your whole body.

3. Active Relaxation

Before your day starts, focus on your breath for 5 minutes. This Active Relaxation will allow you to connect with your thoughts and notice how they boost or subtract from your energy levels.

You can also take the time to check in with yourself before each major task. When you take one minute to just see what thoughts are popping up, you move from fear to joy. This helps you make sure you’re in a positive frame of mind and at your utmost capacity for creativity.

4. Give Help (Make someone else happy)

Try to offer someone help every single day. You might give away a free consultation or offer a helping hand to someone who could use your help. Try to do this because it just makes you feel so good to help someone. If you aren’t feeling energized by helping a certain person, then feel free to find someone else who is more appreciative and can give you what you need.

5. Ask for Help (Allow someone to make you happy)

We are not in this world alone. We are here to help and support each other. Try to ask for help a few times a week. It might be an introduction to someone that can help your career or just a quick question. It’s amazing how helpful and wonderful people are if you give them the opportunity.

The Key

Apply at least two of these ideas every single day for 30 days. If you can turn this action into a habit you’ll do wonders for your energy levels.

Don’t just look at what energizes you at work. Look at your home life as well and put these tools into practice there. By incorporating a few ideas into your own life you can create a system that works great for you.

Your Turn

What do you do to stay energized at work?

* This blog post was sponsored by SpareFoot Self-storage.

“SpareFoot is the worlds largest, simplest and best marketplace for self-storage.”  Thank you SpareFoot for supporting work happiness.

* Image courtesy of gregory.ackland

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Give a Boost to Employee Morale

When employee’s love their job and morale is high, employees feel the most loyal to the company they work for. This means the grass doesn’t look quite as green on the other side of the fence, and they stop looking for a job with better benefits or higher pay. This results in a lower turnover of your core workforce. When employees are good at what they do, they make you money, when they’re not, they cost you. If providing lunch everyday can boost employee morale and build company loyalty it may end up saving you money in the long run.

I know from personal experience the impact that free lunch has on employee morale. In 2004 I began working for a large corporate bank. One of the few perks of this job was the fully staffed, free kitchen on the first floor. A benefit of working for the bank full time was the fact that they gave us vouchers for free meals that we could use whenever we wanted. The free meals helped save me money by offsetting my daily expenses, but they also saved me time in the mornings. It usually took me about 20 minutes to prepare a lunch so the free lunch at work allowed me an extra 20 minutes to catch up on the news or sleep in every morning.

Flash forward to 2007 when I was hired by the prestigious Seattle Tennis Club. Although my work there wasn’t food related one of the perks they offered was free lunch or dinner for all employees working eight hours or more per day. Since my shifts were ten hours I was able to eat a wonderful, fully catered meal twice per week. The food they served us was the same food they served in the restaurant which was as expensive as $40 per plate!

Something I noticed during my time at both of these companies was how much more appreciated I felt working for them because they offered free food. I also noticed that interaction between other employees as well as managers was easier to come by during these free meals since everyone generally took lunch at the same time. I think that free meals are a completely affordable benefit most businesses could offer their employees. Not only does it raise morale it also encourages employees to feel connected to other employees through meal time conversation that otherwise wouldn’t take place.

Increase Workforce Health

It’s common knowledge that healthy employees cost you less. Whether it’s in less missed work days, better productivity, or lower costs for health insurance; everyone wins when employees stay healthy. So what does workforce health have to do with providing a free lunch for your employees? Everything!

When you decide to offer your employees a free lunch you get to determine, to an extent, what they eat for at least one meal five days per week. While this won’t make a drastic impact in their overall health it’s definitely a good place to start. Some people have never given the food they eat much thought, they simply shovel down whatever tastes good and in the process, sacrifice their health one meal at a time. If you provide a great tasting, health conscious lunch every day those same employees may begin to eat the same way at home.

Help Keep Employees Working

Providing a quality lunch everyday can keep employees on the clock through the lunch hour. While it’s certainly a good idea to take breaks, finding creative ways to keep employees working (without making them feel slighted) can result in less expense and higher profits for your business. This is especially true for salaried employees who are paid the same regardless of how many hours they work for.

Your Turn

Have you ever had an employer provide meals for you? What was your reaction?

A self-professed foodie, Richard Bracke loves to dine at new restaurants and try out new food combinations in attempt to be constantly refining his tastes and palate. Richard currently blogs and writes for EZ Cater who specialize in a wide variety of options for your local catering and lunch catering needs.

Editor’s Note: If you want to learn other ways to make your employees happier and more engaged, register for the Let the Employee Love Shine through this Valentines Day! (free one hour webinar) There are limited spots, so I would suggest signing up as soon as you can.

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I know getting mad at myself doesn’t solve anything. It’s just such an ingrained habit that’s hard to break.Every now and again it sneaks back in. Then I take a deep breath and tell myself it’s up to me to create more positive habits.

So I’ve been taking more time to apply Active Relaxation to my workday. I also tell my clients don’t compare yourself to others, take baby steps and enjoy the process. I haven’t been doing any of these things. I’ve been beating myself up by letting my arch nemesis dictate my happiness.

I’ve been working on a course called Brain Recharge. It’s a comprehensive course that walks people through the process of increasing their energy, lowering their stress levels and improving their productivity. As I’m putting it together I realize that I’m trying to put this huge course together and I’m not taking baby steps.

The only way to get to point B is to do one thing at a time.

So I asked friends, meditated on the idea and listed countless ways to create this course. I was still lost.

Your Help

Instead of tackling this problem all by myself I asked for help from you. I asked you if you would rather me create one big course and charge $49 or charge $5.99 per section. I actually decided on selling the first module for only $4.99.

53% of you said you wanted individual sections. 47% of you said you wanted the whole package all at once.

You were as torn as I was, but it helped me realize one thing.

I needed to create individual courses à la carte and one big course for people who wanted all 12 modules.

I’ve decided to release one section at a time over the next few months.

Thank You

I’m so grateful for all your help and feedback. I couldn’t do this without you.

The first module is called Active Relaxation. It teaches people how to turn their mind into a friend that supports and encourages their career, allowing them to bring more energy to workday.

If you don’t have the right mindset no amount of coffee will matter. That’s what the first lesson is all about, learning how to work with your mind so you can stay emotionally balanced, happy and energized.

I learned a valuable lesson in all this. Keep a work journal. It’s vital to career and personal growth. Because I decided to take a break and do a little reflection in my journal I spurred myself to reach out and ask for help from you.

You need to take the time to step back and see where you need to steer your career. Otherwise you don’t have any control.

Your Turn

How do you check in with yourself to make sure your career brings you daily joy and a sense of accomplishment?

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My hope is that we create a give and take relationship. I actually hope to give as much to them as they give to me.

Too often I get caught in the daily grind and don’t take time to discuss various ways to succeed, become happier and connect. Taking the time to stop and talk with a super smart team of people is a must for every career.

Over the next few months as I assemble my team. I’m going to let you know about the process.

1. How I found people to be on my advisory team.
2. How I reached out to them.
3. How I conducted the meetings.
4. Etc.

My hope is that you learn from this process, so you can create your own team. Is there anything specific you want me to cover as I go through this process?

Also I’m putting together the 2013 Work Happy Now team of interns. In return for your help I’ll be mentoring you throughout the year. Sound like a cool opportunity? Then fill out this short survey and I’ll be in contact with you very soon.

* Of course if you want to fast forward your career happiness you can always hire me as your career coach. If you want to set up a discovery session to see if we are a good fit for each other just fill out my contact form and I’ll get in touch with you withing 48 hours.

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The video didn’t turn out very well. I’m still working on my video recording skills. The content is great and I think it makes up for the out of sync lips.

Here are a few key tips that you’ll take away after you watch the video:

1. Why great loss can be the best time to start fresh.
2. How to let go of your fear and reach out to people who can help you.
3. How to find clarity within your goals.

Jenny’s recommended books:

• Finding Your Own North Star (Amazon Affiliate Link)
• Steering By Starlight (Amazon Affiliate Link)

 
Check out Jenny’s amazing site Life After College.

What take away did you get from watching the video?

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Right?

Nope.

Because you are trained to have doubts. Your Arch Nemesis (resistance) takes over and stops you from making a positive impact.

You need to listen to these fears, walk with them and still believe in your superpowers to make this world a better place.

When you stop believing in yourself, you stop dreaming.

We need you to dream big and make this world a better place.

You deserve to be happy and have a great career.

Let me say that again – You deserve to be happy and have a great career.

What do you do to build your confidence when you are feeling down?

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