50/50 Effect
Every action has an equal and opposite response. It’s the law of our thoughts, nature, and the universe. Accepting this fact will open many closed doors.
I used to be stuck in black and white land. I thought that I was only allowed to walk through the white doors while the black ones were off limits. Where did that obscure metaphor come from? It doesn’t matter, what does matter is my own limitations.
I was limiting my imagination, creativity, and fun by 50%. This happened in almost every situation in my life. These patterns run deep.
$220
When I was 14, my friends and I found $220 on the ground. We were at basketball camp which would have given us the freedom to buy candy, athletic gear and what I thought was happiness. My two other friends wanted to turn the money in. I argued, but to no avail. They handed the money in. I was pissed.
We could have made a terrible time into something fun. I thought this $220 was the answer to my prayers. What I wasn’t able to see until many years later was that I never gave myself a chance to have fun. At the time I thought the camp was a terrible program. A lot of it may have been the camp’s fault, but I never owned up to making a good time of a tough situation.
This outlook ran its course throughout my life. I never thought to argue for just $20 or even consider my friends’ points of view. My two friends were both raised Catholic and if they didn’t turn that money then in that was a sin against God.
That’s way more important than me buying candy.
I couldn’t see any of these options. It was all black and white.
Every Job
Every employer was always lame or boring and wasn’t able to challenge me. They were the dark cloud wrecking my life.
My emotional shift began when I started to see the patterns reoccur at every job I had. I would emotionally pull away and coast.
It’s Never All Your Fault
I wasn’t able to enjoy a job until I realized that I needed to take 50% of the responsibility upon myself and give 50% of the responsibility to my employer. When I stumbled upon this realization, that’s when the joy started flooding in.
No problem is 100% your fault and no problem is 100% someone else’s fault. Blame can be spread all around.
I was giving 25% effort and expecting 100% return. You know what I got - 10% return. I blamed every company for not being more accommodating. However, if I wasn’t trying hard, how could I expect my managers to try to make me happy? They didn’t care because I didn’t care.
Not every company will be weak in all the same areas. I realized my problems extended from my outlook. It was my fault that I couldn’t enjoy my job.
None of the jobs were a perfect fit, but it’s about building your career foundation and using those skills to take yourself to the next level.
That next level may be starting your own business or rising through the ranks to become head engineer. It could mean just being happier with the work that you are presently doing. There are goals to reach at every job and it’s up to you make them happen.
Notice Your Patterns
Watch how you might return to the same emotional choices when confronted by a difficult situation. Maybe your job isn’t giving you all that is required, but are you giving enough in return? This is difficult to diagnose because many times we are too close to the situation.
Be honest and put blame on yourself as well as the company.
Try to find solutions that will fit your needs as well as your company’s needs.
The 50/50 Effect puts the responsibility for work happiness on both ends. If you give more and your company doesn’t return the energy then find a company that is willing to appreciate you.
It’s up to you to make your happiness come alive at your job. If it never blossoms then run like a crazy mad man/woman and find a job or career that’s going to help build your future you.
Have you ever run away from a job like it was the plague? Was it a good decision?
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Image courtesy of Jairo BD
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