(If you can’t see this video then click here and visit Work Happy Now to view it.)

This site is all about working happy and I must admit. I love doing these videos. They take about as much planning and time as a regular post, but so much more dynamic.

We all use tricks to get us focused and pumped for a big meeting or a new job. What do you do to get your mindset aligned with your needs?

I use my red underwear – literally.

This PG-13 rated video does show my underwear, so look away and only listen to this video if you don’t want to see my red undies.

If you liked this video article you’ll like these too:

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Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

One day I’m complaining about the weather then the next day may be a similar day of weather and I’m enjoying it. My mood dictates my complaining.

I’ve been documenting my successes and difficulties of no complaining for the month of December.  My complaining hasn’t reduced that much; I wish that I could report that it has, but I must be honest.

The positive that has come from this challenge is my ability to not connect with my complaining. I am learning to allow my external and internal complaints to happen, but not let it dictate my feelings.

In my last “No Complaining” update I talked about how I complained to a fellow co-worker about my lack of pay. We all want just a little more. What I noticed from watching the complaint pop out was my lack of attachment to it. I care that I don’t make as much money as I would like, but I’m reducing its ability to dictate how I feel.

Andy Rooney and Politicians

I’ve been watching Andy Rooney on 60 Minutes, who is one big complainer. He whines about his watches, hand bags, and everything else in his life. His complaining has made him millions of dollars. He even complained because 60 Minutes gave him a watch with no numbers on it. The audience just chuckles at his observations.

He whines and gets rewarded. It’s because of his tone. If he whined without including a bit of humor to his voice no one would watch him.

The same goes for politicians. The weaker party always whines about the party in power. They do this to keep bringing awareness to the issues. Eventually people take notice when government inadequacies affect them. The weaker party can say, “We’ve been saying that for the past two years.”

We don’t notice this as complaining because they do it with authority. They make a claim and shout it to the world. The anger masks the complaining as a strength instead of a weakness.

The Silver Lining of Complaining

Most people in my life whine for the sake of whining, but never look for a silver lining. They just point out what’s wrong with a situation, but do nothing with this information. I don’t mind a bit of complaining if it’s lined with something funny, makes a good point or creates a compelling reason to take action.

On my way home I noticed my complaining kicking in during my commute home… again. But this time I wasn’t attached to the pain. I noticed these feelings then thought about eating dinner with Nikki and posting this blog post. Weaving the direction of my complaints into a positive feeling or letting it spur me into action has done wonders for my happiness.

If you enjoyed this article I know you’ll like:

• Day 16 of 30 – No Complaining
• Day 8 of 30 – No Complaining
• Day 1of 30 – No Complaining
• No More Complaining at Work – A Thirty Day Challenge

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

I can’t say that I was perfect. Man-o-man did I slip up more than once. I caught myself on the phone complaining to a co-worker about my salary. With so many people losing their jobs, I decided to stop myself in mid-sentence and I changed the topic. It may not be the perfect job, but at least I work with good people.

No complaining has been harder than I expected because it’s a part of how I communicate with my co-workers. I don’t think all complaining is bad – far from it. The reason I started this 30 day trial was to become more aware of my thoughts and actions and see if I might want to implement “no complaining” into the rest of my life.

I’m wavering on this at the moment. I can see how no complaining has improved my mood, but I can also see a loss of connection with other people. Just the other day a fellow co-worker was complaining about the spending habits of the company. I totally agreed and was ready to give my own example, but I couldn’t. All I could do was empathize with her.

The conversation died and we were left in silence until I brought up college football. That’s what was cool about no complaining; it took our conversation in a more positive direction.

I’m not going to rush to make a decision on whether to stay with no complaining forever. I’m going to wait until the 30 days is up then make my choice.

The Signals We Send Out

In the past, when I complained about having to do a report I was reinforcing the negative. My thoughts were focused on why the situation wasn’t living up to my expectations. I was signaling to myself and others that I wanted to be lazy. Side Note: Laziness isn’t all bad in moderate doses.

Complaining signals to people how we want to be treated. The problem with complaining is that it shows people what we don’t want instead of encouraging them to give us what we need.

I tried a little twist in the way I signal my co-workers during a conversation. Instead of complaining about a crappy task, I graciously accepted it then asked for something in return. Of course I don’t always do this, only when the moment feels right.

This is how I was able to maneuver some of my duties to be outside of the office, like speaking to high school students about financial literacy. I didn’t realize that I had been doing this over the past few years. Now that I’m becoming more conscious of my complaining, it has been easier to communicate my needs.

When I graciously accepted the project and signaled that I also wanted to try something new I was showing my boss that I was a team player, but also wanted something fun to work on. He got the hint and now I’m helping create the structure of my day instead of just doing as I’m told.

Internal Complaining

For the past couple of days as I was getting ready for work I was internally complaining about getting out from underneath the warm covers, standing on the cold tile floor in the bathroom, and how I needed more time to do Yoga before work.

I watched this happen since the beginning of this 30 day trial. The funny thing is I knew it was there, but I’ve gotten so used to my complaining that it took a few days for me to really be honest with myself and admit that I was complaining.

Once I noticed this internal whining I stopped feeding into it and took action. Two mornings ago I ripped off the covers and tried to enjoy the feeling. Way too shocking. Nothing but negatives were popping out of my thoughts. I tried a different technique this past morning.

I slowly inched the covers off and let the cool air envelope my skin. This technique worked. My senses weren’t overloaded and I had time to adjust and figure out the little nuances of the experience.

To solve the cold tile problem, I just put on my slippers. An easy solution that I had previously ignored because I just loved complaining instead of doing something about it.

I still couldn’t find enough time for my Yoga, well… not as much as I wanted. It was my fault. I had decided to send out a couple of emails, accept comments, and comment on a few blogs. I accepted that these choices were made instead of doing Yoga. By accepting my decisions I stopped creating conflict. Just because I wasn’t able to do Yoga doesn’t mean I wasn’t making good use of my time.

I’m the youngest in the family and those of you who are the youngest probably understand what I’m talking about. We’re used to getting what we want.

By-product of the No Complaining Challenge

My mood has significantly improved. I don’t think I would be able to see much of a difference if I just took notes at the end of each day. I would be missing the moment to moment improvements. By staying aware of these moments I’ve readjusted my thinking, which has helped me see what the “no complaining” challenge was really doing for me.

I’ve been able to sustain a more “even” emotional level. For example, I would usually get frustrated if I couldn’t get an email finished the way I expected. I would leave my chair, go to the bathroom and come back with a fresh take on my writing. This hasn’t happened as much. I’ve stopped my internal complaining about not meeting my expectations and accepted that the email is what it is. Since it wasn’t perfect I just slowed down and started rereading at the beginning, making sure I knew exactly what I wanted to say.

I’m not sure if this is a byproduct of all the development I’ve cultivated over these past couple of years, but whatever the case, this “no complaining” trial has raised my emotional development to a new level.

To break it all down, the only difference between me before and after my week of “no complaining” is my awareness. I’m still internally complaining, but I’m not feeding into these thoughts. The thought comes in and I begin to play with it. I bat it around, laugh at it then see if I can turn it into something that I can enjoy.

Complaining is not an evil habit, it’s just a way for your mind to grab attention. If you give attention to the complaint and then give your mind something more positive to work with, you can use complaining as a tool to increase awareness of your thoughts and feelings. It has helped my emotional intelligence grow stronger and I know it will help you be able to create the experience you want instead of letting the situation dictate your feelings.

If you liked this article, you’ll like these too:

• Day 8 of 30 – No Complaining
• Day 1of 30 – No Complaining
• No More Complaining at Work – A Thirty Day Challenge

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

My first day of no complaining went well. My mood was especially chipper. I wasn’t surprised by this because I could tell that I was on a mission. I wasn’t going to succumb to the temptation of whining/complaining.

I only noticed myself complain when I was interrupted in the middle of an email. My boss wanted me to work on a different project and a little complaint came out. I whined that I wasn’t able to finish my thought. I didn’t let my boss hear my complaint, it was just under my breath, but alas it was still there.

Internal Complaining

I could feel my internal whine begin to come out on my way home. Traffic wasn’t too bad, but it’s a weak spot for me. I think this was due to my low blood sugar levels. I usually stop snacking around 3pm, so as not to fill myself up before dinner. I’m going to keep an eye on this because I might be able to reduce my complaining by keeping my blood sugar at a tolerable level or actually learning to deal with less food and not let my body dictate my happiness. This will be fun.

Before I allowed the usual commuting to rage come out, I decided to nip it in the bud with a book on tape. By occupying my mind I was able to relax pretty much my whole way home. I’ve tried this before, but my ADD usually kicks in and I forget to stay focused. I made up my mind to listen to the book and I stayed with it.

My wife was at night school so I was stuck walking the dog and cooking a meal. We usually trade off, so a little sigh came out. I considered it a complaint. I’m trying to be tough on myself in the beginning so I’ll improve as the 30 days progress.

By Product of the No Complaining 30 day trial

My face was very relaxed today. Most days I have some tension in my forehead, lower back and jaw. This tension was non existent. I’m not sure if it was a lucky day or not, but I’m going to keep an eye on this too.

Because I’m not allowed to complain I’m noticing that my thoughts are trying to find something positive in the situation. I think all my personal development work over these past ten years has really helped me to reach this level.  Not too bad (a little pat on the back. My mini celebration – Yes!)

I can feel that it’s easier to access positive thoughts because I’ve been planting positive seeds that are really flourishing.

I’ve decided I’m not going to write about No Complaining every day. I think my next post on the no complaining trial will be this time next week, unless some brilliant breakthrough occurs.

If you liked this article I bet you will probably like these too:

• Day 16 of 30 – No Complaining
• Day 8 of 30 – No Complaining
• Day 1of 30 – No Complaining
• No More Complaining at Work – A Thirty Day Challenge

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!

The spit comes flying out

of his mouth,

splashing on to his desk.

He doesn’t even have the decency to stand up.

His fat tired legs are tired of making an effort.

Funny thing is he doesn’t have a problem yelling at you until his veins turn red to purple.

He’s pissed because of

a mistake you made.

Encouragement isn’t in his vocabulary.

You must master

your happiness.

You are the King of sweet smiles,

compliments,

and compassion.

You have to give yourself the encouragement that he doesn’t give.

The courage to find a job

that will end

the big bad wolf’s intense anger.

To a place that won’t stress you out at night as you are trying to fall asleep.

You’ve always had the power

to improve your career,

it’s been hiding in your back pocket this whole time.

Pull it out and change…

Change the thoughts and external pain

so you can put out work

that will bring you

the life that you deserve.

Other Articles to Inspire You:

• A Steve Pavlina Interview on How to Build Your Career
• When Your Career Sucks, You Can Fix It
• Imagination Isn’t Just for Kids

Image courtesy of JelleS

Download the Free eBook Work Happy the Google Way * Post from: Work Happy Now!