21 Questions You Should Ask Yourself Every Monday
It’s not the answers that you receive that bring you happiness; it’s the questions that you ask.
The question must come before the answer.
If you are looking for the answers on how to enjoy a tough project, they won’t come. You are searching for the end point when it’s the journey that will help you find the joy.
For example, if you go into work every Monday morning wondering why you aren’t happy, then you will focus on why you aren’t happy.
If you go into work with a question such as, “how can I improve my happiness?” You are focusing your mind on finding a positive answer.
Here are some of the questions I ask myself every Monday…
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Bring Hope Back to Your Company
(If you can’t view this video then click here and visit Work Happy Now to view it.)
Hope seems to have dissipated within many of our companies. We have latched on to the fear and we don’t want to let go.
Enough already!
Let’s bring the happiness back into the workplace. That means spreading positive news, ideas and conversations with each other. It will take time to build our confidence back up, but we have to start sometime, so it may as well be today.
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Blogging for one blog is a lot of fun, but imagine blogging for two blogs that focus on work happiness. It’s a blast!
Over at the Chief Happiness Officer’s blog, PositiveSharing.com, I’ve taken over and posted some cool posts. I’ve posted two posts so far and gotten some mixed feedback. The people have been mostly positive, but a few don’t like my ideas. This is actually good. I’m learning a lot from an audience that isn’t used to my style.
Check out the two posts on Alex’s blog:
If you liked this video cast you’ll like these too:
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Notice the Every Day WOW
You are walking to the meeting room and nothing registers on your external radar. You’re probably lost in thought, trying to prepare yourself for the people in the meeting. You don’t notice the beautiful painting of the little house tucked along a hillside. You don’t notice the people walking by you because you are so focused on getting everything in order.
If you are too caught up in cramming for your meeting, you won’t be relaxed and able to communicate with a clear mind.
You are also missing out on a huge percentage of all the good stuff in your life. You are too busy trying to keep things under control that you forgot to let “WOW” be a part of your every day life. Sure, we all get used to the same things in our life, but when we choose to ignore them instead of taking a little time to enjoy where we are then we are losing the most valuable tool to enjoying our jobs – appreciation of the every day details.
Point B
We’ve all heard the statement that half the fun is the journey, but what it doesn’t say is that you need to stop and soak in the journey. When you are rushing to the next thing you are never taking the time to notice the regular “WOW.”
This thought was spurred by a NY Times article. It was written by a doctor who has gotten so used to death that it took a new resident to show him that he had to slow down and let moments sink in. A death may seem significant to most people, but this doctor was becoming accustomed to it. We may not have to deal with this at our jobs, but there are many noteworthy occurrences that happen to each and every one of us that go ignored.
We chose to ignore the beauty in our lives. We do this because we think that we need to stay focused and be so productive that we accomplish all our goals. If we don’t then we get mad at our inability to achieve our tasks.
Why so many people are unhappy at work
We never take a look around and appreciate the bang, boom, and crack of the simple. You are one of the luckiest persons in the world, being able to relax and enjoy this article.
The best description of how lucky we are to be here was written by a Zen master. I’m paraphrasing. It went something like this…
The chance of you being born is as likely as a plane flying 10,000 feet over the ocean, the co-pilot throwing a hula hoop out of the plane, which lands in the middle of the vast sea, and having a turtle float to the surface and pop her head up within that hula hoop. You have been given a gift to accomplish great work. It’s up to you to enjoy it.
How Lucky We Are
It’s up to you to take time to see the wow that’s in your life. It could be…
- A joke from a customer that makes you laugh.
- A telephone call that brings you a $10,000 contract for you company.
- A bird chirping outside your home office.
- Your mother calling you just to check in.
Some days are filled with deadlines and getting to point B, but take the time to notice the regular “WOW” and you’ll improve your ability to relax before a stressful event like a big meeting.
Articles Related to Expanding Our Ability to Appreciate Our Current Situation:
- Just a Little More Effort for True Happiness
- Productivity at its Most Effective – When It’s Easy to Apply to Your Life
- Use Failure as Your Slingshot
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Positive Belief
It’s not positive thinking that makes people have a good outlook on life. It’s positive beliefs that build happy people. A person can think all the positive thoughts they want, but if they don’t truly believe them then they aren’t true for that person.
You’ve probably met people who are good at what they do and the only thing that matters is happiness. Whatever it is that made them confident goes to the core of their being. You’ve probably also met people who seem to be confident and content, but then you see their dark side. They lash out in a tough situation or maybe they give up right in the middle of a project. False confidence will always show it’s true face if you stick around long enough.
Real vs. False Truth
There is a big difference between real and false truth. They both look similar at the outset, but eventually it all flushes out.
There are many different kinds of fake confidence: covering an insecurity, trying to copy others, lack of talent and thousands of others.
There are many different kinds of real confidence: knowing and trusting choices, being creative and unique, talent, and thousands of others.
Real and false confidence are not easy to distinguish, but by watching and learning as people go along in their lives, you’ll see whether their beliefs come from their core or if it is just a façade. Some people have fooled me for many years. I had a boss that yelled at people when they weren’t doing a well and didn’t have any problems speaking his mind. At first I was impressed and tried to do my best, but after a few months his aura of confidence faded. It wasn’t anything he did differently; it just took a little observation to learn that he covered up his insecurities with yelling and micromanaging.
Real confidence comes from within a person and flows out naturally. It’s like a little kid who knows the answer to a test because she studied her butt off. The confidence just comes out because of all the hard work. The thing is many people can study hard and know all the answers, but they still don’t have the confidence to put themselves out there because they’re fearful of the consequences. They’re afraid to fail because the people around them will criticize their mistake. When a person is not afraid to make a mistake then true confidence will shine through. A mistake can be forgotten if done with good intentions, but a mistake out of fear is harder to forgive.
How do you cultivate true confidence?
By doing the best you can. That is all you and the world should ask. Only you know if you are doing your best. When I write these articles and blogs I’m putting all the effort and energy that I can into the work. Some are better than others and that’s just the fluctuation of being human. When I work on a report, I edit it once on my computer, print it out and edit it again, give it to a co-worker for inspection, and then read over it one last time so I know that it’s as clear and smooth as possible. I have gone overboard at times because I was feeling insecure and edited the report into the ground. On the other side, there have been times I haven’t taken the time to edit a report as thoroughly as I should because I was too confident.
Confidence is a daily balance that you’ll have to find as you go along in any business or personal relationship. The best way to develop your true confidence is by being compassionate and patient with whatever you are doing. Compassion will allow you to forgive yourself for your mistakes. Patience will help you learn from your mistakes and make the next try a little better.
I lacked confidence in my ability to speak publicly (that’s why I joined Toastmasters and I’ve improved by leaps and bounds, but still need more work); investing the family’s money (and again I’m not afraid to do it, but I’m learning by reading and talking to professionals); designing a good blog (and once again, I’m working on my skills); meditating well (I practice everyday); designing a great advertisement (I’m always looking at magazines for inspiration) and there are so many more things that I could improve, like playing the guitar and dancing. But I must tackle a few things at a time. When I spread myself too thin I get frustrated.
I’m confident in many areas like my marriage, my ability to write a well thought out idea, my smile, my conversation ability, laughing at a good joke, making a good joke, creating new ways to reach new customers and many other things. I may be confident in all these things, but I am still improving on a daily basis. We must always keep improving our skills, even the most basic things like writing a good email. When we improve in one area that we already feel comfortable in then we realize how we can always keep growing.
“If you are called to be a street sweeper, sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, ‘Here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.”
- Martin Luther King
There are only so many things that you can be good at and perform with confidence, so pick your battles and knock them down one by one. I have my list of things that I’m looking to build my confidence in. What’s on your list?
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